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A Rich Tea Morning & Chocolate Cocoa Nib Shortbread

The other morning I received an email from an English colleague who was translating a cookbook from English to American. She frantically needed to know if there was an equivalent biscuit in the states to the good old English Rich Tea. It was 7 am on Saturday morning and I, slouched in bed, was not feeling the same biscuit urgency as she. Before you ask why on earth I was up this early on a weekend- I wake up at 4:45am for work, so, 7 am is now referred to as a lie-in. But then I began to think about the good old Rich Tea biscuit- crisp and plain with a hint of malt, dunk it in your tea, count to five and it melts on your tongue. Some would dare to call it bland, dry or merely a ‘base’ biscuit that ought to be covered in chocolate or filled with cream. I would suggest it as ‘unblemished’. It is a pure and simple dunking biscuit – as biscotti goes with a cappuccino; a Rich Tea goes with a nice cuppa brew. I digress.

It was going to be a challenge to uncover a biscuit close to such simplicity- but I was willing to make a few changes in my schedule, which today included lying in bed, eating a bagel (that I’d sent my boyfriend to buy) and lying in bed some more. I emailed back accepting the task stating that I would need a few days in order to complete this challenge in a thorough manner. In other words, nursing my throbbing head after last night’s vodka sodas was going to take all of today, please come back again tomorrow.

The author of this book was my first culinary idol- my copy of her book covered in stains and crumbs from so much use. A domestic goddess indeed and the inspiration behind so many of my own recipes, I was not going to let her down- I just wasn’t going to do it today. I instantly received a message back-“great, thanks. Can you let me know by the end of the day- the book needs to go to print.” I had a pounding head and a craving bacon- getting my taste buds to change course was not going to be easy. I removed myself from bed and propping myself up over the bathroom sink I stared into my dishevelled reflection. Today, I was super-rich-tea-woman and no salt was going to get in my way.

I began devise a plan to weed-out anything that wouldn’t be necessary to test. Chocolate chip cookies, sugar cookies, Oreo cookies, oatmeal raisin cookies, peanut butter cookies, shortbread cookies, and wafers could all be overlooked. But amongst all this sweet junk did anything plain- almost but not quite savoury exist? I have to admit- I don’t regularly go down the cookies’ aisle in my New York supermarket- I only ever seem to find sweet disappointment with whatever I pick up. In fact come to think of it- I rarely find myself picking up a desert menu in a New York restaurant and have my eyes light up at what I see. Perhaps my sweet tooth just isn’t cut out for America. I digress.

I made a stop at Gristedes Supermarket. Usually I have an inner monologue that sings a song referring to it Gross-tedes, but on this day I put my snobbery aside- I was super-rich-tea-woman and supermarket design was not on my agenda. I was on a mission and I had to get in and get my dizzy head back to my bed.

I got home, filled my favourite oversized Starbucks mug with PG tips (milk in first) squeezed out the tea bag and began ripping open the packaging of the biscuits. I dunked, sipped and paired each one with cheddar. By 9 am I had already consumed half a days calories and two days worth of caffeine- I was a sight scarrier than that of two-hours ago. I narrowed it down to three and then two- both made by Nabisco, the ‘Social Tea’ biscuit and the “National Arrowroot”. I concluded from the packaging of the ‘National Arrowroot” that not only does it have a bizarre name it’s also for teething babies- probably because it has very little sugar. Further to that conclusion, I concluded that Nabisco only promotes products that lead to cavities and diabetes only to Americans’ who actually have teeth to ruin and not to those without.
I digress.

To my surprise, there are such products in this land of sugar-a-plenty that come close to an unblemished Rich Tea- but whilst I ran on a higher treadmill setting that evening and then scrubbed my teeth with even more care that night I decided that my opinion on the American cookie aisle really hadn’t changed all that much. I like a little salt in my sweet.

Continue reading ‘A Rich Tea Morning & Chocolate Cocoa Nib Shortbread’

A RECIPE: Energy Bars

Published June 12, 2007 Chocolate cake , Dried apricots , Energy bars , Maine , condensed milk 1 Comment

It is not an exaggeration to say that going on “holiday” with my family is like going on boot camp. The usual R&R (rest and relaxation) that most people associate with holidays, in my family stands for ‘R’un and ‘R’un some more. This isn’t to say that it’s a bad thing- we’re just a very unique/somewhat senseless family. Survival of the fittest is not a term to be used lightly in describing holidaying with the Helms’. Our reputation precedes us; rain or shine.

I just returned from three days in Bar Harbour, Maine with my boyfriend and parents. My boyfriend and I ‘ummed’ and ‘Arred’ about whether or not this would be a painful (in muscle and mind) experience to go on holiday with the rentals and in the end decided, (as I suspect any young, broke couple would) what the heck it’s free. So off we went, armed with our best smiles, energy bars and codeine.

Maine is perhaps one of the most beautiful places that I’ve visited in the States- reminiscent of Scotland with its hills, beautiful crystal clear lakes and of course satanic winters to match. The beautiful serene nature of Acadia National Park was on our doorstep and I could have spent the entire weekend sitting on the porch rocking chair enjoying the view. But the only sitting that a Helm does on holiday is on a bike. They were rented within thirty minutes of arrival and off we went for the next six hours and two days, caked in forty-five sun block to protect our delicate British complexions.

As I see it, the only good thing about such active holidays is the amount of food that a Helm feels they are “allowed” due to excessive exertions. My family not only competes in physical exertion but also in voracity/deservedness of appetite. We like to feel that we’ve earned our next meal- and if you haven’t put in enough effort before breakfast, you can forget the eggs and bacon- it’s muesli for you.

On this particular trip it was the seafood that we were all “working” for- lobster and crab being top of my wish list. The rocky shores and crystal clear waters of Maine have given it a reputation as a wonderful habitat for shellfish- and I wasn’t about to ignore it. My parents’ had stayed in our designated B&B before and had warned us that breakfasts there were typical American fare- loaded with glucose that would only lead to a disastrous mid-race sugar crash. Stragglers would be left behind- this wasn’t a place for the unfit.

It was thoughts of food that got me through the following six hours and two days. As my legs peddled away through the mountains, I daydreamed about tying a bib around my neck, savagely tearing at the flesh of a lobster and indulgently sucking the juices out of it’s claws. My bruised sit bones, muscle aches, blisters, sunburn and new addiction to codeine were perhaps a high price to pay for a few extra calories- but as a Helm, I like to think they were worth it.

Continue reading ‘A RECIPE: Energy Bars’

A RECIPE: Simply the best Chocolate Cake

Published February 7, 2007 Baking , Chocolate cake 11 Comments

What I’m learning about Americans’ is that they know what they want and ‘gosh darn it they’re gonna go out and get it’. They have far more guts and ambition than us polite conservative “oh, I’m terribly sorry, am I in your way” Brits. And I have to say-I’m a big fan. Of course there are areas in life where this aggression takes a less admirable stance but for the most part it cuts out all the time wasting crap and gets you straight to the point.

For one thing, it means there are no morning hold-ups in Starbucks with “umming” and “erring” about what kind of coffee to get and what kind of milk to top it off with. “Get me a grande non-fat, double shot mocha latte. Hold the cream”. Americans’, know what they want.

I’m the same with my attitude towards food. I know the end result that I want and if I don’t get it then I swear profusively, pout my lower lip and then keep at it until the recipe works the way that I want it to work. Baking books can be very guilty culprits of making something look amazing in the photos and then the home cooks end result is a disappointing mess that gets thrown in the bin. As a food stylist, I know why this is- and yes this makes me a guest at that guilty “it doesn’t look like the one in the picture” party.

So, to make up for the fact that I make a living out of deceiving novice cooks and avid bakers alike by wasting their time on sub par recipes I have here a chocolate cake recipe, which certainly isn’t a time waster. It’s just plain and simple as good as it gets- the whole nine yards without any pit stops. My mother bakes this cake and then has to freeze it after the first slice so that she doesn’t eat the whole thing. My approach is somewhat different but then restraint is not something I can make claim too. I know what I want and gosh darn it I’m gonna go out and get it.

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Simply the best chocolate cake
This cake is big and rich and if you’re into sharing then it can feed 20 people. The ingredients need to be of the best quality- there’s no messing around with this cake.

Equipment you will need:
3 large bowls.
Electric beaters
2 deep 8” (20cm) cake tins greased and lined with parchment paper

Ingredients:
For the cake
400g plain flour
250g caster sugar
100g light brown sugar or muscovado
50g good quality cocoa powder (not drinking chocolate)
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp bicarbonate of soda
½ tsp salt
150ml plain yogurt or sour cream
1 tbsp vanilla extract (not essense)
3 eggs
175g butter, melted
125ml sunflower or corn oil
300ml ice cold water

For the icing:
150g 70% cocoa chocolate
225g butter
250g icing sugar
1 tbsp vanilla extract

1/ Preheat the oven to 180C/Gas 4. Mix the flour, sugars, cocoa powder, baking powder, bicarbonate of soda and salt together in a bowl.

2/ In a new bowl, whisk together the eggs, sour cream and vanilla until completely blended

3/ In a new bowl, beat the melted butter and oil together with your electric beaters, then add the chilled water and beat to combine.

4/ Add the dry ingredients to bowl number three all at once and beat with your electric beaters on a low speed.

5/ Add the egg mixture and mix until everything is blended.

6/ Fill your baking tins evenly, making a slight dip with the back of a spoon in the centre of each cake. Place into the oven on a central shelf and bake for 40-50 mins. Check after 40 minutes by lightly pressing your finger into the cake, if it bounces back and a toothpick comes out clean, then you are in business. If not, return the cake to the oven for 5 minutes and finish the washing up.

7/ Remove the cakes from the oven and leave in their tins for 10 minutes before turning out onto wire racks. Allow to cool completely, you’ve waited this long so don’t get impatient now.

8/ For the icing, melt the chocolate over a double boiler and set aside to cool slightly. Beat the butter until soft and creamy, then sieve over the icing sugar and beat until light and fluffy. Gently pour over the vanilla and chocolate and mix until smooth and glossy.

9/ To put together use a large serrated knife to even the rounded tops of the cakes. (You can reserve these scraps to snack on without anyone else knowing). With a palette knife spread a generous layering of icing one one half of your cake before placing the other cake on top, bottom side up (this will give a nice flat top). Then place remaining icing onto the top of the cake and spread evenly down the sides and over the top, using your knife to smooth the sides, and being careful to wipe your knife of any crumbs. Allow the icing to firm up in the fridge before serving.

A RECIPE: Fifth Avenue Shortbread

Published January 11, 2007 Caramel , Chocolate cake , Shortbread 10 Comments

There is no questioning the fact that shopping in New York is great. But, I visited Saks fifth avenue yesterday- which I found to be more of a museum than a place that one would go to buy a pair of jeans. I was given a gift certificate there for Christmas- a mixed blessing if you ask me as there is very little to buy there under a couple hundred bucks (not to be ungrateful). It’s definitely not my kind of store but I worked my way round hoping that maybe there was an amazing food department hidden somewhere- like Harvey Nichols, Selfridges or even Harrods where I could blow my credit on a beautiful hunk of cheese or . But, alas, no there is no food department ( or not that I could find). Just floor after floor of expensive clothes and people spraying you perfume. I’m a cook, so I spend my life stinking of garlic with flour hand prints on my backside-I definitely don’t belong in this kind of place let alone these kind of clothes. I left empty-handed with the idea that when my more glamerous sister comes to stay she might be able to guide me through the maze of luxury that is Saks. And in the meantime, I’m going to make my favourite Millionnaires shortbread- renamed ‘Fifth Avenue Shortbread’ because I think it’s good enough to be sold at Saks.

Fifth Avenue Shortbread

This is my all-time favourite treat. The chocolate you use here is very important, so buy as expensive as you can afford. I love Green & Blacks- a mix of milk and dark is beautiful.
ps. A flour print on you backside is essential to your success in making these.

For the base:
175g/6oz butter
75g/3 oz caster sugar
175g/6 oz plain flour
75g/3 oz corn flour

For the middle: ( you can double this if you like a thick caramel layer)
100g/4 oz butter
2 tbsp golden syrup or maple syrup
1/2 tin condensed milk

For the chocolate layer:
200/7 oz Green & blacks milk and/or dark chocolate

1 20cm x 30cm baking tin

1 Heat the oven to 180C/Gas 4/350F. Beat the butter until soft, then beat in the sugar. Add the flour and cornflour and mix until it comes together into a ball. Line the base of the tin evenly and prick all over with a fork. Bake in the oven for 20-30 mins or until lightly golden on top. Allow to cool.

2 Once cool, melt the butter in a small saucepan, then whisk in the syrup and condensed milk until combined. Stir over a gentle heat, constantly allowing to come up to a gentle boil (do not allow to burn!) and allow to gently simmer until it thickens and turns a golden colour (this will take at least 5 minutes). Pour over the cooled base and allow to set.

3 Once the caramel has set, break the chocolate into pieces in a bowl. Place a small saucepan with 2 cm of water onto boil, once boiling, place the bowl of chocolate over the water (make sure the base of the bowl isn’t touching the water) then turn the heat off and allow the chocolate to melt slowly, stirring occasionally with a spoon. Once melted, pour over the caramel layer, spread evenly and allow to set in the fridge. Cut into squares and feel better than a million dollars as you sink your teeth in.